The waiting game..

Pregnancy is a big long wait, almost 40 weeks in fact which is just very long!

I've finally almost hit the first milestone of 12 weeks. I'm 11 weeks today and I was desperatly hoping for a scan date through the post this morning. They are very spot on with the scans doing most of them at 12 weeks, not 10 weeks like they do in some other areas, unless they've changed their ways of course?!! Maybe I should ring the hospital and check I'm still on the list?!

It's my birthday and very unusually I didn't get any post at all. mimble wimble and some of the usual cards are absent. Hmm maybe you get less as you get older.

Anyway had a nice day with the hubby off work to take me shopping, out for lunch and ice cream and then help at home with the little monster. Ended up buying nothing for me and a Postman Pat SDS van for little monster! (very early birthday present).

Now please just send me that scan date NOW!!!!!!!

Slightly miffed

I went for my booking in appointment today. I'm 10 weeks 2 days according to my dates and the midwife didn't really bother about a due date.

Lots of writing in the green notes again and lots of sticky labels. Lots of silly questions about family history and if I'd had any bizarre diseases or blood disorders.

Bad points:

Still no scan date

Didn't get to hear heartbeat

Can't give birth at Chorley unless the consultant says so due to forceps delivery last time, so will have to have a referral appointment at Preston, personally don't think I can be bothered with the hassle of the appointment so might just accept the situation and ask for a tour of the unit as I can't remember much from last time.

All the above has left me feeling rather confused and upset, the first time I've cried in a long while anyway. Maybe it was the emotional shock of leaving little man with a friend for the first time almost ever, maybe the shock of being pregnant has hit me suddenly. Maybe it's hormones!

Will start focusing on upcoming birthday next week and organising lunch out.

Secrets

I've been keeping a secret, not very well because I've probably told at least 10 people by now! It's been very hard but I can't wait any longer and the lovely people who read my blog are now to be told "I'm Pregnant!" Yes really. Personally I don't think it has sunk in yet.

Oh yes the sickness, nausea, burping, bloating and extreme exhaustion have all brought me down to earth with a bump. Looking after a terror tot going through a naughty phase is and has been overwhelmingly awful, thank goodness we've done potty training before the strops and tantrums began, these have now given way to just sheer naughty behaviour!

Little man has entered the next stage of intellect, Why? why? why? he asks constantly and after most requests to perform actions or after each explaination. If you are wondering when it will come it seems to be proceeded by "what's that?" and later "what's that noise?" He knows about our baby who is being called baby pip for now and has asked on several occassions when it be coming. After telling him after Father Christmas has been (January) he now seems to think Father Christmas brings babies and that he will be going to live with Grandma and Grandad when mummy goes to hospital. We've corrected him of course!!

Fears of miscarriage are still floating around, I am yet to have my 12 week scan but I feel confident that all is well and if not then it obviously wasn't meant to be. Also slight worries over the birth bit & whether the labour will shorter than last time. However I am really to consumed with feeling awful to think much into it all at the moment.

I ask if you know me in real life - away from the blogging world to keep the secret safe and to yourself until I have had my scan, just in case there is a problem.

We're off to Scotland..

on Sunday, in the caravan. Hoping it will be nice weather and that I will soon start feeling better. We're not cancelling this holiday after we lost out at the beginning of the month.

The route is set up to Loch Lomond, the east side of the Loch which is quieter and is where the West Highland Way runs. We could climb Ben Lomond if we fancied but personally I think we'll look at it from a boat and hope the loch sickness isn't too bad!!

We're hoping to visit The Sealife centre, the falkirk wheel and enjoy many days sat by the loch hopefully without midges. All planned to be relaxing and non-stressful and lovely. Oh (big screeching hault noise) we're taking our 30 months old toddler!

We've just hit the next stage of terrible twos, the defiant "NO!" accomopained by kicking, screaming, loud yelling and point blank refusal to co-operate. This has happened before but now it is more severe. Distraction techniques are becoming less successful.

We're also trying out "what happens if I do this" behaviour. Examples include banging one's fork repeatedly on the dinner table and resorting to banging with hands if fork is taken away. Other examples have included throwing things down the stairs (mainly toy cars) and basically just being plain naughty.

Little man seems to have no remorse, shouting at him makes him laugh and the only thing I think is working is the naughty step. We introduced this all of a sudden last week but it's taking time.

All this behaviour I could really do without right now. I'm feeling very awfully ill and exhausted. Thank goodness for half term holidays so parents in law are around to help with the monster.

Oh well back to dreaming of realing by the loch........ AHHH!