Free

Well little man has been asleep for an hour now and I've been on the internet for an hour, not really doing anything constructive. As I keep telling myself I need to get doing things - it will help me. I am wishing little man would sleep until 5.30pm but we all know that's not going to happen and then he would be running around all night. I am very grateful that he goes to bed no problems somewhere between 7 and 8pm and sleeps through 12 hours at least :-)

I can't conform to strict times anymore, neither do I do what "people think I should do" as much as I used to. I do try to ensure my little man's sleep is at roughly the same time every day and I won't go to afternoon playgroups so he can has his sleep. This is partially for my own sanity! Being a mummy has given me freedom, freedom to take 3 hours to do the shopping in Tesco if needed, freedom to go somewhere slowly and not panic too much about when you have to back. Especially if one takes lots of food and juice out in her bag little man can be fed anywhere and whilst he is quite adapatable and well mannered things go very well. Sometimes I hate it when hubby says it's time to go to bed - why can't we just go to bed instead when we feel tired!

I'm a lot happier now and I have found that stopping looking in a mirror constantly worked wonders. I have also stopped watching the news, around the time of the World Trade Centre terrorist attacks and the following London tube bombings I got extremely paranoid that the Eastern world was going to attack the West and we would end up in WW3. I even considered stocking up on tinned food and bottled water but luckily common sense prevailed. Several years later I hardly think about it. I came to the conclusion that the news programmes and newspapers are completely incapable of telling anything except bad news so I don't read them anymore. I don't follow politics and probably couldn't tell you the the names of the treasurer and the foreign seceratry but I really don't care.

The baby monitor is sending me little man's baby babble from the car so he obviously awake .. off ot get hima nd see what the afternoon brings! x

Eventful weekend and nice smily Monday

Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you can start to climb out again. That is my thought for today.

What eventful weekend included a emotional breakdown, a lost wedding ring, a metal decetor, search for a bucket & spade, a fantastic Italian meal and a calming of everything when the ring was found! Managed to have a good chat with hubby about everything and this week things are much better and there is much more concern which is lovely.

The metal dectector cost £25 and a drive to Preston to get it. Thank goodness it worked. We now have it sat in the garage and I wonder when it will next see the light of day. We also found some bolts, cable clips and nuts in our search for the ring.

Today was nice, spent the wet morning tidying and decluttering whilst playing with son. Iron kept tripping the RCD on the fuseboard which was annoying but a good excuse for not having done it (yet again). Managed to bake 2 cakes which was an achievement. Gluten free fruit cake for hubby turned out much better than the sponge cake I made for my "afternoon venture" but will rty harder next time.

After a lunch of homemade pizza we set out in the car so baby boy could sleep. Since the age of 8 months he has been impossible to get to sleep unless it is in a moving pram or car. Spent a nice 40 minutes in car park at Worthington Lakes listening to the birds sing and read book I like - "Anybody Out There?" Think it's by Marian Keyes. It's a good book but a little depressing as the main character is struggling to come to terms with the death of her husband. Almost fell asleep and when friend and her baby boy turned up had to get out in the fresh air for a while.

Took baby boy out in the baby carrier today - much better than the pushchair. He was heavy but I managed although had to walk a bit slower than usual. Tea and cake was also very nice afterwards whilst we chatted and watched the boys run round the garden, being very cute, chasing chickens, getting wet & sandy, picking up stones and mud, falling over and getting up and generally doing what toddlers do best! Both are starting to say nonsense to each other and it's fun to try and guess what they're saying.

The week is busy ahead, Leeds on Wednesday and Scotland on Friday! Gosh I am going to be well travelled. Absolutely flabbergasted at the price of return train tickets to Leeds so we are going to drive - it will be cheaper.

Scotland involves the caravan so much apprehension here but really looking forward to getting away from it all. Must now go and help pack caravan - still exhausted but looking forward to having a nice hot bath later .

Slobber cuddles!

This is what we have been having a lot of today. It is what happens when your 16 month old son is teething. Today's challenge has also been trying to get both fists in one's mouth at the same time. He is being very brave with it though. Tonights tea was refused and we resorted to pureed apple and pear pudding in a jar as I did not want him waking up hungry.

He has been wonderful and even built towers of megablocks and pushed his toy trains round the track saying choo choo! His baby babble is starting to sounds more like words and he is really coming on.

Been a bit worried he's a bit big for his age as he keeps knocking other little ones down when he trys to cuddle them! Not sure where the cuddling fetish has come from but it's very cute. He gave the toy fireman out of his fire engine a cuddle

Being a SAHM does has it's disadvantages - you are suddenly expected to go to CPC and collect orders because "you have lots of time" according to my husband. So after our tumbling session at Tumble tots we will have to go to Preston. Must try to return a baby carrying item to a friend on the way as well. Got very annoyed but calmed down now. More annoyed that I keep getting interupted really. I like my me time sometimes in the evenings.

Still feeling awful about 2 hours after going outside, mmm strange and feeling very full and bloated but hungry at the same time!!! Am fairly now convinced it is not to be (see yesterdays post!) and possibly hay fever or just me needing to eat more heathily perhaps??

Leaking kettle solved by purchase of a new one. Loving husband said it was to risky as water was everywhere. So after another trip to Tesco (i really hate that place) we're trying a value kettle - only cost £4.78 so you can't really complain and it's under guarentee for at least a year. I still can't believe the kettle leaked and the electronic kitchen scales broke both on the anniversary! Hope it's not a sign.

Very pleased with Spanish chicken which i cooked for tea tonight - 'twas very yummy and going to do it again along with the French chicken from the other night.

lots of random blogging tonight - very pensieve I think! Looking forward to Scotland but might pay the guys across the road to help move the caravan at this end!

anyway today we are smiling better and going for a french fancy and a cup of tea from a non-leaky ketle! he he

To be or not to be...

That is the question for today and in about 2 1/2 weeks we will discover the answer. Thinking back to recent events it could be quite likely "to be" and next January could be very interesting!

Still feeling rubbish and tired all the time. Sore throat, headache and generally lethargic. Walking for 2 hours this afternoon has made it worse. Little man wouldn't go to sleep which was unusual and only fell asleep at 3pm which is not good for bedtime. However I do not wake sleeping babies unless it is after 5pm so he can sleep. I also need the space. I am wondering if I have hayfever, there's pollen all over my car and we walk through the park most days so it's a good bet! Will now search the cupboards for any left over pills from 2 years ago.

Mum is coming tomorrow but doing the usual 10-3 shift which is very annoying. Can't she come 9-5 instead?! Think we will go to the park before she comes. She doesn't ever seem to realise that I get depressed sometimes and thinks I should always be happy as I have a wonderful little boy to play with all day everyday. I have to point out that as well as playing we have temper tantrums, moments of destruction, great upset when the toy train becomes de-railed and a fasinaction with Bob the Builder, diggers, trucks and other machines (not cars and all refferred to as "didi") and not forgetting trains or "choo choos" as they are called. This is why I love him so much.

Little man said "look" today and has been babbling away to himself for long periods of time. I will have to add look to his word list which I am trying to keep.

Trying to decide what culinary delight to whip up for tonights tea and need to bake hubby a gluten free fruit cake at some point. I am however very tempted to go to bed now but you can guarantee that little man will wake up the minute I do.

Meanwhile I am off to see if a cup of tea from my leaky kettle will improve things at all?! Yes my kettle is leaking and it's most annoyingly not under guarantee anymore (only had it 2 years).

Pacifying plants?!

Well today is my first ever time at writing one of these and I will later see if it has worked!

Today is my 2nd wedding anniversary and my lovely husband surprised my with a lovely bunch of flowers. Very shocked as only expected a card! Despite it being our anniversary the day has been like any other Tuesday with the exception of the visit to the local supermarket which was done yesterday instead it has also been very hard and difficult. Not helped by feeling slightly unwell in the stomache area. Resulted in a bout of tears at about lunchtime.

However a spot of retail therapy buying some plants for the garden whilst my 16 month old son slept in the car worked wonders. One is a rhubarb plant which I hope will grow and give us lots of free rhubarb. The other two are flowers and look very nice - no idea what they are and if I can keep them alive but with my son's passion for watering the garden with his tiny watering can we should be okay!

Was very impressed with my culinary skills for tea. Had a glass of bubbly but will leave the romantic stuff for the weekend as having a whingey toddler flinging spaggettii hoops and mashed potato across the dining room isn't good! Poor thing has a temperature and is teething again.

My son's sunflower is growing like mad and I think it is time it went outside after being repotted. I think it is 30 cm and I am going to try and keep a record of it on here!