Warning - I'm stressed...

I need to let off steam - excuse for a minute - AAARRGGGHHHH!!

We've just spent more than 24 hours in the company of both my parents, staying at their house. Wonderful you might think. On tap babysitting, free food, no cooking, being able to go back to bed in the morning after changing the little man's nappy for underpants.

But in reality for me it's more like this, bad food & far too much food, extreme lack of consisitency in parenting styles and mixed messages and mummy's "orders" being overwritten at the drop of a hat. I'm not brave enough to voice my opinions so I mutter under my breath and get annoyed.

The parents go on and on about their dream of taking the little man on holiday on his own with out mummy and daddy - I hate to mention but this is NOT going to happen. They talk endlessly about their upcoming cruise which we've been hereing about since June.

A one day visit also ends up being much longer than it should be.

I have also decided that we don't live far enough away, a 40/50 min drive made easy by the proximity to the motorway network and the horrors of all horrors - My dad has just retired!!!! Argh!!!!

He's just offered to come and pick me up on Thursday, take me to see my friend whom I am meeting in their hometown, then pick me up again and take me to the shopping villgae I mentioned, then I can go for tea at their house and wait for my husband to drive 30 miles out of way to pick me up after work so we can go home again. Lovely you might think - but NO! I'm 29 not 9. I need my space and I'm used to my own freedom and little man and I doing what we want WHEN we want to. If hubby drives to pick me up we won't be saving any petrol either so I'm sorry but I value my freedom and everytime I come back from a day out with my parents I'm stressed to the max, huffing and puffing, can't sleep and so wound up it drives me mad. Christmas is the worst, but that's another story.

As nice as the above is it will drive me potty. I'm going to have to disappoint him. Then comes the guilt trip - You can't bl**dy win!!!!

Right now where's the property section for the Highlands of Scotland..... no hang on maybe we need to look at emigration to a remote Carribeean Island instead...

Something New..

Little man will be starting at the local nursery in 2 weeks. We go on Wednesday for our first visit and I will stay with him for a while. Hopefully if it all goes well, we'll go for 2 mornings a week.

I've also signed up as a registered trader for Phoenix Trader. I'm selling greetings cards and wrapping paper and other lovely gorgeous things through the catalogue. I'm getting ready a book of samples to get as many orders as I can and may also do some "card parties" if I can pluck up the courage and also get some hosts! It's not like Pampered Chef as you can't really do much with cards other than display them and hope they sell themselves.

I love the samples I've been given they are wonderful, the Christmas Collection is fab and although there are cheaper cards out there, I think these are really unique and quite fab.

I hope it will make me some money and also give me an avenue into the adult world of working and organising oneself with something other than a toddler/baby bag.

Meanwhile I am wondering what has happened to the world of postnatal care, it seems that having a baby is no big deal and you should be back at home, cooking the tea withing 6 hours of giving brith. If you have a c-section you get 2-3 days before they want to kick you out. Personally I feel a little more support is required, otherwise the rates of postnatal depression will be shooting up all over the place and breastfeeding rates may not be as high if people are struggling at home and feel too scared to ask for help and support.

Can I hand in my notice...?

I'm beginning to dislike my wonderful, perfect job.

I'm fed up of the constant nagging, begging and pressure to do things NOW! I am constantly being asked questions and expected to know the answers, even the questions are obviously rhetorical or just plain and simply stupid. The worst question is "why". Almost every question begins with this.

I do not want to play trains anymore and I have stopped putting bridges in track layouts as I cannot face "wixing it" 7 times a day. If I here another word about piston rods I think I will scream. The fact that "Hank" the train has a double personality as "Gordon" is equally annoying.

I don't want to have put all the crusts in the bin again, but if I cut them off he invents edges and won't eat those either. Luckily he's quite easy to please in the food departemnt.

I am constantly having to repeat that the television cannot be watched, nor can DVDs especially when requested. They are allowed of course but saved for when the best programmes are on which have some sense about them and rationed as to not over expose the child. (Peppa Pig, Thomas & Friends, Come Outside and Chuggington) or when Mummy is so exhausted from the constant barrage of everything that she needs to drink a cup of tea with some degree of peace.

Oh and not to mention the mini strops after each request. "Please tidy up your toys, it's time to go to bed." "No, I won't!, I don't want to go to bed" - folllowed by screaming and foot stamping! We ignore it and persist with the request but it really does annoy you.

I've had to go upstairs this week to scream and throw something across the room. I try not to let him see!

Can I have a new job please?!!!

The joys of pregnancy..

are:

eating nothing but toast, crisps and breadsticks is perfectly fine and NO I won't get scurvy - this is just a temporary measure to stop the constant nausea.

Forgetting to drink enough water and becoming horrendously constipated. Constipation causing other terrible things to get worse (no need to elabourate I'm sure!) also having to take lactulose to help with the above.

Falling asleep at random times of evening.

Wanting to sleep and being nagged to play trains/cars/farms/building sites etc..

Being unable to take little man out for bike rides as I know I'll be to exhausted to run after him now he can do it so fast.

Getting strange looks off people when you're out of breath after walking up a flight of stairs or arriving at playgroup, which is only 200m away from your house.

Maternity clothes being far to big but normal clothes being too tight.

Needing to have a wee frequently

Constantly being asked - "are you going to find out the sex?"

Sad to say the excited hormones haven't kicked in yet, thankfully though we can now eat a sensible diet without having to rely on vitamins!

A little smile came creeping...

up on me this morning.

I am finally 12 weeks pregnant and I know when my scan is.

I can stop taking folic acid, I think it makes me feel sick.

I have activities planned for every day this week so hopefully looking after the monster will be easier.

For some strange reason I just feel happier, the prospect of going to playgroup this morning has excited me. Then we have a mammouth supermarket shop to do as we've run out of everything!

Meeting up with friends I've not seen for about 12 weeks on Tuesday for lunch. Food is much better received when someone else cooks it.

Usual Wednesday playgroup with spare afternoon to indulge the monster in painting with mummy or the park.

No visit from my mum on Thursday - I'm not being nasty but it's always nice to have a change, so I can go to Little Nippers and see friends from there who again haven't been seen for weeks. Then we are taking the little man to see the scan.

Tumbletots on Friday, Hmm not sure the little man enjoys this anymore but we've paid for a term so need to keep going.

Slight niggles to annoy me:

why why why? do we have to pay for the scan pictures this round?!

why isn't it Thursday now?

why is Fifi and the flower tots so annoying?

1 week to go!

I have 1 week and a few hours until we can see baby pip for the first time. I have fianlly rung the scanning department at the hospital as I still haven't had a letter despite being almost 12 weeks pregnant. Hubby has managed to get the time off work and the little monster/man is coming along to see everything!

If everything is okay at the scan I will tell the whole world and it's neighbours! I will probably announce it on facebook too. So all those who won't know, will soon know.

We're almost at the magic 12 weeks milestone. This time however I have told lots of people. I have found it very hard this time round. I have been feeling very sick, extremely tired and out of breath all the time. I felt so bad I had to tell people so I could have some help with the little man. I think it's the worst part of pregnancy except for the childbirth bit!! No one knows you are pregnant and you get very funny looks in Tesco when you are huffing and puffing after loading 5 carrier bags full of food into the trolley. I can't use the enviromentally friendly bags so well as I can't lift them!

Hubby also gets the award for sympathetic husband, most of the time. He's had to take on more child care, cooking the evening meals and been alone in the evenings whilst I've been asleep from about 7 until 11!!! He's done it without moaning but the housework is slipping as he doesn't seem able to remember to help out with that. But I am very pleased and can't complain.

Meanwhile I have accured some birthday money which I am going to spend on some new shoes and as soon as I am feeling better, I'm off for a bit of pampering at a beauty salon.

Little man's behaviour is improving slightly, the new trick is running away to hide after being naughty so we can't tell him off. Or so he thinks. His idea of hiding isn't exactly very well hidden, sometimes it's just putting his hands over his eyes!!

Anyway, roll on the scan and the second trimester!!

The waiting game..

Pregnancy is a big long wait, almost 40 weeks in fact which is just very long!

I've finally almost hit the first milestone of 12 weeks. I'm 11 weeks today and I was desperatly hoping for a scan date through the post this morning. They are very spot on with the scans doing most of them at 12 weeks, not 10 weeks like they do in some other areas, unless they've changed their ways of course?!! Maybe I should ring the hospital and check I'm still on the list?!

It's my birthday and very unusually I didn't get any post at all. mimble wimble and some of the usual cards are absent. Hmm maybe you get less as you get older.

Anyway had a nice day with the hubby off work to take me shopping, out for lunch and ice cream and then help at home with the little monster. Ended up buying nothing for me and a Postman Pat SDS van for little monster! (very early birthday present).

Now please just send me that scan date NOW!!!!!!!